college
Dealings with Diplomas
Was it only yesterday? Wow. Everything was a blur. Graduation is the kind of event that catches you up in its momentum, leaving very little time for reflection. But I am going to process some of it by writing about it now. I hope to post a picture or two soon.
***
Yesterday morning, I woke up on edge, looking at the clock to make sure everything was on schedule. I said good morning to my roommates and noted the beautiful weather. My sister came over to curl my hair, and I made a myriad of preparations - eating coffee cake with my fingers (because all of our utensils and dishes were packed), doing my nails, brushing my teeth, etc.
My two (former) roommates are my two best friends. On one of our birthdays last fall we bought balloons and let them go in the city. We were going to do it again before graduation. We had purchased balloons the night before, but it was a little chilly and they had deflated slightly. Outside in the sunshine, we tried to release them, but only one floated away. It was Sarah’s, and she is going to South America to teach in the fall. My other roommate’s drifted along at eye level for awhile, and mine dragged on the ground. I really hope that wasn’t symbolic of our respective futures!
***
Per instruction, we arrived at graduation an hour early and waited in the hall near the auditorium. It was lots of fun to take pictures, hug friends, and roam around talking to people. The hour drew near and we were herded into our double-file line, then shuffled along the corridor. Suddenly, my part of the line arrived in the auditorium, and it was an overwhelming moment - music was playing, people were screaming and cheering, and cameras were flashing. I looked everywhere for my family and spotted them waving and crying and smiling.
The ceremony really seemed to fly by. My division was one of the last to walk, so I got to see almost all of my friends go first, and I cheered loudly for each one of them. Then it was my turn, and it seemed unreal that I was walking across the brilliantly-lit stage to shake the president’s hand and take my diploma. Suddenly I was walking down the other side and taking my seat, and that was it! I was a college graduate!
***
I won’t bore you with the details of the rest of the day, but it moved so quickly. The ceremony over, we socialized with friends and family. My family and I went out to lunch, then packed everything up and headed back home. It took quite some time to unload the cars, since my sister was moving home too. My room is full of so much stuff! I just want to snap my fingers and have everything clean.
It really does seem surreal that it’s all over. It was hard to say goodbye, very hard. At the same time, I’m overjoyed to be done with homework and college-related stress. And the future stretches ahead of me in all of its quivery, uncertain possibility. But I dwell in possibility, yo! (I am sure Emily Dickinson would be proud of that construction.)
***
I’m taking it one step at a time. My next step is to get my life organized again, and continue my job search. I am so happy that I graduated. The Lord has done great things for me, and I am filled with joy.
a photographic summary of my current state of mind
Three finals down…
One project/presentation to go!
Mi Vida Loca
Things have been so, “This is my life, and I’m graduating soon, and that’s about all I can say” around here lately… it’ll change soon. But not yet!
I’m a little overwhelmed… Last week I turned in a project that needed 30 small group activities… or so I thought. Come to find out, I actually needed 180. So I’m 150 activities behind. I need to get it done by Thursday (my professor was gracious about giving me an extension). I also have an oral final tomorrow, which I’m nervous about because I hate verbal communication under pressure. I have a final meeting on Tuesday night that I have to get some things ready for, another big final on Wednesday morning, and a final presentation on Thursday morning. Oh, did I mention that I also have to babysit Monday and Wednesday? And I’m sick with a cold and a very sore throat.
Near the entrance to our building there’s a bulletin board, and right now there’s a news clipping about the famine in Haiti. Every time I come in or go out, I see the headline that says “Haiti’s poor resort to dirt as food.” I don’t know, somehow that seems to put all of my difficulties in perspective.
I’m going home after graduation, which isn’t what I really wanted to do, but I need to for financial reasons. I just think it’ll be kind of anticlimactic, but it’s okay. I’ll be traveling some this summer and going to New Attitude, and I’m so excited about that.
This is disjointed, but I wanted to send out the update since it’s doubtful I’ll be writing much this week - unless I just do it as a stress reliever, which is what I’m doing now, and then it’s never really much. I appreciate your prayers, I really do. Six days… I would be counting down but I don’t want to because as much as I want all this stress to be over, I don’t want to say goodbye.
You mean I still have to study?
Okay, so I’m writing this to inspire myself. I have to kick it into high gear here, people. I’ve been living in this dreamland where I do a little homework, think about graduation, indulge in melodramatic sadness about leaving my friends, yawn my way through the day, and ignore the fact that I have so much to do I need to go above and beyond.
So… yes. I’m afraid the last week of my college career won’t be full of kite-flying and Gilmore Girls watching. Sadly, I must actually apply myself to these few remaining tasks. Of course, I am definitely going to make time to enjoy being with my friends, but if that’s the case, then I also have to apply myself diligently.
Which means: tonight, I need to get all three of my essays done. Tomorrow, I need to get my research project done. Saturday and Sunday need to be spent studying for my first exam. Monday and Tuesday will be spent finishing up some papers for Tuesday night and studying for my Wednesday exam. Wednesday, I’ll spend some time preparing for my (thankfully low-key) presentation on Thursday. Then I’ll be done! (We won’t mention the fact that I’ll have to spend Thursday packing and cleaning like crazy.)
No more procrastination! I need to finish strong! One more week! I don’t feel like I can do it, but I think I can…
Persecution, Faithfulness, and Grace
Tonight I was humbled when I read about continued religious persecution in India on Persecution Blog. One of the two stories is extra poignant for me.
Seven young women from Gospel for Asia Bible college were “sharing the love of Christ.” Then a government official began to argue with them. He confined them to one room for almost four hours, called in journalists to take pictures of them, and forced them to write a statement saying they were spreading Christianity.
Three elements from the story stood out to me:
- The young women are students at a Bible college. I am a student at a Christian university. How similar, yet how different, our situations are.
- These precious sisters were sharing the love of Christ in a hostile region. Where I live, the environment is mostly safe and comfortable. Am I still taking the risk of sharing Jesus?
- For evangelizing, the women were imprisoned, albeit briefly. They were granted the great honor of suffering for Christ. I wonder how I would respond.
I have to be honest. As I’m writing this entry, I am feeling incredibly frustrated. This week, I’ve gotten very little sleep. And the people who live in the apartment above us have chosen tonight to move furniture / walk around in high heels / see who can stomp the loudest. While I’ve been writing about persecuted Christians on the other side of the world, I’m fighting an angry heart towards people nearby.
I know the timing isn’t accidental. If I want to be faithful in the big things, I need to be faithful in the little things now. Do I ever need grace for a changed heart and a steady obedience.
One Page
Four years of making lists of the homework I have to do. The methods changed, but the substance didn’t.
I just made a list of all the homework I have left this semester, and it fits on one page.
One page, y’all!
I think I’m seeing the light. I can’t believe I accomplished everything (well, almost everything) on all those lists for all those years. See, this is why I’m glad I went to college. Sure, maybe I could have learned everything without the degree. But college pushed me like I never would have pushed myself.
So on to reality. 21 more tasks to complete before my homeworking days are over for the foreseeable future! (Until grad school, that is…) Woohoo!
John Piper on College (Part 2)
Here’s Part 1.
After addressing why he thinks college is important, Piper goes on to outline four mistakes for young people (more specifically, college students) to avoid. My comments are in italics.
“Mistake #1: Big is better than small. God uses little David-like people to accomplish huge Goliath-like things because He is jealous to get the credit. Don’t worry about big. Worry about faithful.”
I love this. Sometimes I see in young people a misplaced passion and idealism for doing big, radical things for God. While dreaming big is wonderful, and being radical for God is what we need, we should realize that being a janitor can be just as much of a ministry as being a missionary in Africa. It’s all about the heart.
“Mistake #2: New is better than old. Read old books. You need the wisdom of the ages to combat the folly of the present.”
I always wonder how young people who know so little about the past can hope to understand today’s culture.
“Mistake #3: Having is better than being. There’s no correlation between the fullness of life and the muchness of having.”
Something to be remembered daily.
“Mistake #4: Visible is better than invisible. The most important things are not visible. God is invisible and He is the greatest reality of all. If you structure your life around sight, it will be out of touch with reality. Do not be much interested in outward appearance. Be interested in inner realities.”
And the conclusion… I love it.
“If God is God - and He is - small with Him is better than big with anybody. His old things are better than anybody’s new things. Being His child is better than having the world. And better to be blind with the invisible God than to see everything without Him.”
John Piper on College (Part 1)
College students: Ever get the question, “Why are you in college?”
This is why.
“We’re in school to see a whole panorama of life that comes out in all manifestations of disciplines in the hope that all these beams of light refracted in human minds will lead us to the source of all things so that we know Him better.”
I feel like we should add that to the admissions catalog… wow.
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I'm Anna. I'm 22. I love reading and writing. I'm a recent college graduate living at home. And I hope you are blessed by what you read here.