Darling baby, I can’t believe you’re one.

Has it been a year already?

I put you down for a nap a few minutes ago, and you sucked your thumb and looked up at me with those bright eyes.

I remembered the first time I held you. What I noticed more than anything were your eyes, clear dark almonds, gazing widely back at me.

When we brought you home from the hospital, you took a nap in your pack ‘n’ play, and I rested in bed nearby, but I couldn’t sleep. It sounds silly, but I felt like I was going to miss something, and I didn’t want to miss a moment.

I haven’t taken enough pictures of you, or enough videos.

But I’ll never forget this precious first year of your life.

Being your mama is one of the greatest privileges I could have asked for. I don’t deserve it. I pray to be made worthy of it.

I know the times that are coming in your sweet, mischievous little life will try my patience and self-control more than any time in the past year could have.

But more than anything, I want to show you the love and grace of Jesus. Because I am in desperate need of it myself.

I can’t wait to see who you’ll become. Watching you grow is a joy, and so is seeing you learn. We’ve celebrated every little milestone you’ve reached this year.

You’re walking eight to ten steps at a time now, so you’ll probably be taking off any day. You can say some words – “Oh, wow” is my favorite. You constantly gasp in awe and delight over seemingly trivial things.

It’s so much fun spending every day with you.

We had a party for you on Saturday, and you ate your entire “smash cake” – an extra-large chocolate cupcake. I hesitate to admit this, but it’s true. I didn’t know you would eat the whole thing and I wasn’t sure if I should stop you or not! You’re still alive and well today. I think you like chocolate.

You’re the little sunshine of our family. Sometimes after you’ve been in bed for awhile in the evening, your daddy and I will be talking with fondness of all of your cute and sweet attributes, and one of us will say, “Let’s go get him up!” (We’re too smart to follow through, though.)

I can’t wait to spend your second year with you. Happy birthday, baby boy!