Why So Many Mommy Bloggers?
Photo by ~K~
Welcome back to the series “Is It Really That Hard?” You can catch up by reading the intro and part 1.
The message board criticism that sparked this series was levelled at moms who overplay their role – specifically mommy bloggers.
You all seem to agree with me that balancing our roles as women is difficult, especially when you add kids into the mix. Anyone who claims it’s easy just doesn’t understand.
But the comments about mommy bloggers did get me thinking. Why are there so many of us, and what is our purpose?
The answers to that question are as varied as the thousands of mommy blogs in existence. Yet I think some of the comments on the first post in this series provide fascinating insights.
Naomi said, “While it’s not the main reason I blog, being lonely is one reason. Talking to my kids all day with no other feedback is hard.”
Sarah added, “For me, the blogging and reading the blogs of others is a way to confirm that I am not alone and to find strength to attempt to do my jobs well.”
Stephanie agreed: “I think a lot of ‘mommy-bloggers’ (like myself!) don’t have the time/resources/whatever to socialize regularly with friends (especially friends who can relate to their specific situation), so they gladly reach out to the online world in search of companionship, empathy, connectedness – even just an anchor somewhere in all the happy chaos.”
LeAnna said, “Because we (as new mothers) are ALL supremely busy trying to get into routines, and figure out what works for us on a day-to-day basis, we don’t really have time to spend socializing outside of the home. Not that we don’t ever, but compared to high school, college, and working-outside-the home years, we really don’t! Think about it, we used to interact with dozens of people on a day to day basis, and now we’re elated for trips to Target, walks in the park, and time spent with what girlfriends we have that can relate.”
The common thread seems to be that stay-at-home motherhood is uniquely isolating. It’s a wonderful privilege and opportunity, but like any other role in life, it has its challenges, and loneliness is one of them.
Not long after Christian was born, I read a biography of Abigail Adams. What struck me is how women of her day kept connected by letter writing, even to people they didn’t know very well or hadn’t met. This reminded me of blogging and the online socialization women do today. So Melanie’s comment struck a chord with me:
“I blog because God gave me a message and heart that wants to connect with others. Blogging is like letter writing in a sense, only it has more than one recipient. I’ve been learning the importance of having godly relationships in my life. Connecting with other Christians and REALLY fellowshipping with them feeds God’s Spirit within me. And the blogs I read that are authored by SAHMs are a part of those relationships… I can honestly attest to the grace and blessings I have received because homemakers blog!”
I wholeheartedly agree with Melanie. While I want to emphasize that blogging can be an idol and online socializing can replace genuine fellowship, it can also be a gift and a tool for growth and building friendships. I have been impacted by so many of you whom I’ve met in this online sphere.
So as long as we sense the Lord’s blessing, let’s continue our modern-day letter-writing, thanking Him for the gift of connection with sisters in Christ!
Anna, this is really comforting and encouraging to me and timely as well! The weather has been rainy all week and Ellie is sick so needless to say, we’ve been quite cooped up and isolated! Therefore, I have really been drawing encouragement from mom blogs in a special way this week in particular!
THank you for a beautiful post!:)
Mom blogs really encouraged me when I was in the (mostly)-stay-at-home nauseated pregnant-woman phase. It was like, “Oh, this is all going to be worth it!”
I hope Ellie is feeling better!
Very true! While I love blogging, and the women I’ve met through it – I’d also stress the importance of keeping and cultivating the tangible friendships we have. We shouldn’t completely forsake the written letters through snail mail, because they are important too. I have a very small handful of friends who know how much I cherish a handwritten letter, and they surprise me with them from time to time. It’s invaluable! So while the “tangible” relationships may be a small portion of our relational interaction, they are a precious commodity. But that is the beauty of being in Christ, a circle of friendship that extends beyond the play groups and Mom’s meetings. I love it!
Very good point. Online friendships can never replace tangible friendships. As much as I love my blog friends, I love my real-life friends more. 
I love this! So neat about Abigail Adams, too. I miss letter writing, but this is the closest I have to it. I’ve met so many awesome mommy cyber friends via blogs. They help me see that I am NOT alone, and that we’re all uniquely different, but so much the same. As long as it doesn’t overtake our time/attention, it can be a wonderful thing.
I admit that it sometimes does overtake my time and attention. It can easily become an idol and I think that is something we have to pay attention to.
Great post, Anna, and I think you’re absolutely right – actually, that’s one of the reasons I started blogging more regularly – a desire to connect with others in my same life situation – which at that point was newly-married Christian ladies. So even some of us non-SAHMs blog for the same reasons!
Absolutely! Blogging connects people in any stage of life. When I first started blogging, I really enjoyed connecting with other single girls my age.
I love this… I always love your blog posts, and the comments on them as well. I’ve often thought that even if I never meet any of my blogging friends in real life, I LOVE the fact that I will meet them all in heaven someday… what an amazing bond to have with people all over the world-Christ Jesus, and the joy we share in Him. Everything else just circles out from that.
I love what you said about Abigail Adams and the Letter writing being compared to blogging, I’d never thought about that before. She is one of my fav historical women-incredible strength. This weekend we had girls weekend in my family, and I was thinking about the difference in men and women, and how for the most part women MUST talk, speak, connect, communicate with other women in order to be fulfilled, it’s part of our nature, and has been that way since our creation really… even the “sisters” of the Lord sat together and mourned through His crucifiction and while they waited for Him to raise from the dead. I’m certainly not attempting to elevate anything we do today to that level, but the parallel of women being together and meeting in all circumstances of life to support each other and talk things through really touched me.
I love the comments I get! Like this one!
I agree with @Melanie too – what a great way to think of blogging! All during my college years, a friend of mine from home and I would write letters back and forth on our best stationery…every word was so precious, and I cherished the time I’d set aside to sit down and write out a letter to her. I truly miss that! I think, unfortunately, the online world becomes a sorry substitute for that kind of intentional care and thought (and TIME!), but if we put that kind of effort into our blogging, it can become a real haven for those of us who find such comfort in this space. Thanks for encouraging me to invest in my online relationships along with the “real” ones!
Great post. We used to write real letters!! I remember one time Auntie Ellen told me that you were frustrated with me because I never answered the questions that you asked. Hahaha. (I made sure I answered them after that!)
You know, even though I’m not a mom, the young “mommy” blogs I read are some of my favorites. You are all so real and genuine and you give me such hope for when and if I am ever a mother! I really love hearing about the seemingly insignificant and meaningless moments, victories, and joys of your days.
To all the mommies…Keep on blogging! I love you all to pieces! 
I’ve always assumed stay at home mothers blog to keep connected. I think it’s a blessing that they CAN. A hundred years ago a street would be full of houses that were full of stay at home mothers and young children. I imagine they kept each other company a lot of the time. Today stay at home mothers don’t have that community, or “sisterhood”, at their fingertips. And women naturally need to support other women and receive support from other women. So it makes sense that today they support each other by blogging. The idea of blogs being like modern letters to many friends is lovely!
I agree that it is isolating and blogging is a good social outlet and one where we can find like minded women. I know for myself, there are so few women I meet who stay at home…it’s becoming rare. And because it’s becoming rare it’s lonely. Finding blogs (such as yours) it’s encouraging because you enjoy staying at home, you desire to be a homemaker, but you also have a voice.