Oh, Baby[wise]: Finale
Today I’m concluding my series on Babywise. (Be sure to start with the intro, part 1, and part 2.) I’m sharing other baby wisdom I’ve learned, and some final thoughts.
Chronicles of a Babywise Mom is a seemingly exhaustive resource on babyhood. The author writes about many methods besides Babywise – including those from books like Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child and The Baby Whisperer. Some of her advice is really helpful even if you’ve never heard of Babywise. From her blog and other reading and real-life moms, these are some of the ideas that have helped me the most:
- Having a simple routine before naps and bed to calm Christian and help him transition into sleepy mode;
- As I mentioned before, spreading out a feeding over half an hour or an hour, instead of assuming he is done when he stops the first time;
- Nursing him to sleep if he needs it or if I’m not sure he’s full - but not making a habit out of it; making sure he can fall asleep without it;
- Paying attention to how long he’s been awake and his tired cues, so I can put him down before he’s overtired.
I have found that while trying to “do” Babywise, reading about it, and talking about it on message boards, I can easily get caught up in it. I can miss the joy of being a new mother. But more than that, I can spend more time listening to what people I don’t even know tell me about child-raising, than I do reading the Word of God and paying attention to the wise people He’s placed in my life. That’s where real baby-wisdom comes from.
Being a mother doesn’t come with a formula or handy list of what to do when. I don’t want to immerse my mind in methodology and problem-solving, rather than thinking about the Lord, and relying on Him for wisdom and grace. I don’t want to approach Christian’s baby months as a problem to be solved, or as an inconvenience for me… as difficult as those middle-of-the-night feedings are! I don’t want to always hear Babywise in my head, telling me the rules. I want to hear the Word of God in my head!
Practical advice is still helpful. I’m not going to toss the baby out with the bathwater… haha. I like to read books and magazines and get helpful ideas. But at the same time, I am learning not to care so much about what I read, but to take what’s helpful for us and enjoy Christian’s baby days as much as I can!
Please share your thoughts in the comment section!
Great thoughts, Anna. We need to remember where real wisdom comes from!
this is so freeing. thanks for sharing. i so appreciate the perspective in your post! (oh, and thanks for your visit to my place today! it is nice to “meet” you!)
You are very right, Anna! I think that also we all perceive things a little differently and have weaknesses in different areas ~ if we are following and walking with the Lord He can point out things that we are missing. We can use the other things as information and then turn to the Lord and see what He wants us to do in our situation for our children.
Each of my 3 have been different and need to be handled differently. My oldest is responsible but my second usually is in a dream world and so I know the first one can handle certain things that the second one just can’t yet. Her time will come! 
Each child is SO very different it really needs to be that we seek God’s face daily as moms to know how to direct the little ones and lead them in love!
“But at the same time, I am learning not to care so much about what I read, but to take what’s helpful for us and enjoy Christian’s baby days as much as I can!”
Amen! Information is helpful…we can’t be islands unto ourselves as mothers but at the same time it is so important to just be in the moment with our children and know that we know them better than any writer of a book can know them, their unique needs, personality, etc and we will “learn them,” even if it takes a little time. NOw, when they get old enough that discipline is needed, I have found that is where I have had to turn more to the books, etc!;) Enjoy this time while Christian is still totally a baby and discipline is not an issue yet!!:)
Oh yes, I will take any advice I can get about discipline! So scary! I’m glad I still have a little while!
I aren’t a mama yet, but found this to be very interesting!
Here’s another article on the same topic: http://pursuingtitus2.com/2010/03/10/scheduling-your-day-without-scheduling-your-baby/
Thanks for sharing that, Alysa! That was a great article. It’s kind of what I’ve done with Christian. I’m in tune with his needs so I can do a routine/schedule that works for us. Another variable this article doesn’t mention that I just thought of is your individual baby’s preferences. Christian has this new thing where he only want to eat about half his meal in one sitting. But an hour later, he’ll eat the other half before his nap. If I just put him down without trying to feed him again, he’d still be hungry – even though that’s anti-Babywise!
Well said Anna! I think sometimes we focus so much on if we are doing it “right” by other people’s opinions and books that we forget that every baby, and family, is different and God will give you the tools and wisdom you need for your baby(ies). Christian is beautiful and so lucky to have you both as parents.