Hope Road

In another response to my “Topics: You Decide” post on January 16th, Joe wrote, “I am friends with a lot of people your age. Sometimes we don’t relate but I keep my trap closed. But I would like to know how to relay wisdom without sound[ing] old or jaded.”

I’m not going to assume anything about the specifics of this particular situation/s. But this did get me thinking about an attitude that I see quite a bit among the culture of my peers (not necessarily people I know personally). And that is an unwillingness to listen to or receive advice from those who are older than we are. Our culture as a whole is developing a very disrespectful attitude towards authority figures. Even in the most “innocent” television programming for kids, we see that parents and teachers are consistently mocked and made to seem like idiots. Kids and young adults are shown to be smart, savvy, and in control of their lives.

I think it’s great when young people have their own opinions and know what they believe and are confident in who they are outside of what their parents and other adults are telling them. But it’s important for us not to carry this attitude too far into an unwillingness to hear from those who have walked life’s road a little longer, particularly our parents (for those of us who are blessed with godly parents) or other mature adults God has placed in our lives. That’s not to say we’re going to agree with everything they say, and that’s fine. But we need to do them the honor of listening to them, and at least being willing to consider their advice and ideas.

So what kind of attitude should you have if you are in the position of being the older adult? I can relate to that a little, I guess. I’m 21, but I do interact with teenagers who are 15 and 16 years old - my sisters’ friends, mostly. And sometimes you just feel irrelevant or sidelined, regardless of the fact that you do have valuable things you could share with them. I think for me, part of it is just not minding that feeling of irrelevance. We’re just at different life stages; they’ll mature and move on, just as I did.

And also, don’t dismiss the power of being a silent example. I could name dozens of people who have never sat me down and given me advice about life, but who modeled godly living and principles for me, while rarely saying a word. When I first got to college, I felt so lost sometimes because I was surrounded by peers, who mostly had lower lifestyle standards than I did. There were very few people for me to bring to mind and think, “Yes, that’s what I want to be like.” Eventually, those kinds of people came into my life, and even when they don’t tell me what they’re thinking, their silent examples are powerful.

Any other thoughts are welcomed, as always.

Filed under: Culture on January 23rd, 2008